If there is a special place where television executives with a trigger-happy "cancel" button go to fester for all eternity, the person(s) who nixed Firefly will be there, operating the welcome wagon.

Firefly. Ask a fan about this show and be prepared to sit for 30 minutes of unadulterated joy and geek. I may hold you for 32 minutes if you’re not careful. We were, for a brief moment, given a glimpse into this ’verse in 2002, courtesy of Joss Whedon.

[THE SERIES IN A NUTSHELL]

How do I describe Firefly in a new and exciting way? What hasn’t already been said about this show? For the uninitiated, Firefly is (on the surface) a show in (silent) space about almost-cowboys and their adventures evading The Big Bad Alliance. Get out the garden trowel, however, and look under the surface: big stories on the small screen about broad ideas enacted in confined spaces. Space never seemed so intimate. Captain Malcolm Reynolds is our captain, my captain. He’s joined on the ship by Zoe (his number one), Wash (the pilot), Kaylee (the mechanic), Jayne (the muscle), Inara (the ambassador), Book (the concience), Simon (the doctor), and River (the question).

We’re going to look at "Serenity," the pilot which FOX decided was too full of plot to air first. Thanks to the folks at the iTMS, we have an updated episode order that reflect the intended broadcast order (and the order in which they appear on DVD).

Episode quote:
Wash: We will rule over all this land and we will call it...this land!

We open with war. No good can come of war. This extended flashback scene is, for Mal and the audience, the moment where everything changes. Where Mal loses hope in a future he believes in, the audience has found hope that amongst the dregs on network television they have found a shining beacon of hope. Flash forward a few years and we’ve got Mal and crew stealing from a silent, abandoned ship in space. We quickly meet all the characters (including the ship, Serenity), get a good frame of reference on all the relationships, and are awed by the cinematography.

Oh, "ambassador." Right.

A few things should be noted before we hit the 23 minute mark: there is nothing cuter than Kaylee and her joy. Thankfully no one thinks the audience needs all the Chinese translated. Context people, context. Book is not your grandpa. Badger has a fine hat.

Crime goes awry, and doesn’t pay even a little bit. Kaylee starts gathering passengers. Reavers? What’s Jayne so afraid of? Could Simon be more of a ponce? I’m just asking.

Episode quote:
Zoe: Now we have a boat full of citizens right on top of our stolen cargo. That’s a fun mix.
Mal: Ain’t no way in the ’verse they could find that compartment, even if they were looking for it.
Zoe: Why not?
Mal: ’Cause.
Zoe: Oh, yeah. This is gonna go great.
Mal: If anyone gets nosy, you know, just...shoot ’em.
Zoe: Shoot ’em?
Mal: Politely.

They’re going to go make a deal with a woman named Patience, who once shot Mal. Mal is a jerk to Inara. No one eats a strawberry like Kaylee. And then we have dinner. We’ve seen Mal defend Kaylee once to Jayne over something small, but when Jayne crosses the line, Mal sends him away from the table. Mal has just been a giant jerk to Inara, but when he defends Kaylee, you just want to yell for him to rock on with his bad self.

Then Inara takes a bath. She and Book come to an understanding and we learn a few things about Mal. We have an Alliance mole on board and Simon has apparently been a bad boy. Dobson isn’t very good at being a lawman, and manages to shoot Kaylee and get knocked out by a preacher. Simon’s got something going on, and he refuses to medically assist Kaylee unless Mal runs away from the newly-arrived Alliance ship. Conflict! Yelling! Space surgery that doesn’t involve waving a wand over the wound and calling it good!

What’s in Simon’s precious box? A crazy, naked girl! River gets one of the best character introductions ever from the box reveal until the end of Simon’s speech on her behalf. Despite the madness, they’re still heading to see Patience. Jayne gets to "interrogate" Dobson, which involves him waving around a gigantic knife and outsmarting Dobson without even getting to cut an ear off.

Suddenly...REAVERS! What are they? Zoe describes them thus: "If they take the ship, they’ll rape us to death, eat our flesh and sew our skins into their clothing. And if we’re very, very lucky, they’ll do it in that order." Why does Inara have a syringe? Luckily for our (big damn) heroes, the Reavers hold course and Serenity keeps flying. Kaylee awakens! But?

Mal tells Simon that Kaylee is dead, so Simon runs at breakneck pace down to the infirmary. Because Mal is psychotic, Simon arrives to find Kaylee making jokes with Book. The deal with Patience seems to be going south before they even set down on her moon, but without any other choice, they head down. Dobson escapes his cell, and proves that not only does he shoot girls, but he will also beat on a preacher who is already unconscious. Dobson tries to contact the Alliance, but he doesn’t have Verizon so the Alliance can’t hear him now.

We have a battle of wits and guns with Patience, whereupon Mal ends up shooting a horse and animal lovers everywhere aren’t so sure Mal is their hero anymore. It doesn’t matter, as the Reavers have followed Serenity to Whitefall, and are a’coming. Oh, and Dobson talks too much. Wash shows mad pilot skills against the Reavers while Book seems to know a bit too much about engine rooms to just be a preacher. Then they pull a Crazy Ivan. Heaps of fun!

We close with Mal and Simon come to an understanding of sorts, and we’ve got a series ahead of us. Not for long, but they’re still flying for now.

Episode quote:
Simon: Are you always this sentimental?

[SCATTERSHOT]

• Joss casts Andy Umberger as the captain of the Dortmunder and then Carlos Jacott as Lawrence Dobson, and the first Whedon "hat tricks" (having appeared in all three of Whedon’s shows) actors are born.
• Inara’s robe gets a lot of play, being worn by her, used as a pillow for Kaylee, then worn by River.
• Wash isn’t holding on to anything while steering after the Crazy Ivan (look carefully). Oops.
• I didn’t talk about the theme song. It’ll grow on you, I swear.

[OTHER EPISODES TO DOWNLOAD]

• Our Mrs. Reynolds
• Jaynestown
• Out Of Gas
• Objects In Space

iTunes Links:

Firefly Series
"Serenity"

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Vern Seward is a writer who currently lives in Orlando, FL. He’s been a Mac fan since Atari Computers folded, but has worked with computers of nearly every type for 20 years.