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Parenting Skillz, Eggheads, Things You Can’t Do, and More
Thursday, June 26th, 2008 at 4:00 PM - by Vern Seward
When my son and daughter were wee they would always come to me when they wanted me to buy them something, which was often and which I usually did. When I changed jobs and we had to move to a new state, new house, and whole new financial landscape, I had to figure out a way wean the kids off my wallet.
My son was the older and he was just starting junior high school, so I created a budget for him and gave him his allowance and lunch money in a lump sum each week on Sunday night. I explained to him how he should budget the money and made sure he knew that if he came up short on Thursday because he blew the cash on Tuesday, tough. Neither I or his mom would give him more money or loan him any and hed have to go without until the next Sunday. We even traded in his He-Man wallet for a nice leather number to celebrate.
At first it was pretty rocky. The $15 a week (this was a bit more than 20 years ago and money went a lot further than it does today) was a windfall to him and hed play the big spender, buying this and that and whatever. There were several Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday afternoons when hed come home from school and literally empty the refrigerator. No lunch money, you see.
He was learning a primary and very tough lesson in economics: If you spend it all you wont have it when you need it.
My approach to adolescent finances had the added benefit of keeping my fridge free of leftovers.
Still, closing the hole in his pockets (and mine) really didnt start until he came to me for an "advance" so that he could go to the movies with his friends.
I said no, of course, as did his mom. I offered to pay him $5 to wash the car (to my satisfaction). Thats when "money" and "work" gelled for him.
There were more money related trials for him, and me, but in the end he did learn that money wont magically appear whenever he asks for it. Today hes doing quite well, Im proud to say. In fact, hes better at managing his money than I am with mine.
Go figure.
I mention all of this to make the point that parenting is an adventure and good parenting skillz are based half on what youve learned from your parents, what life has taught you, and what youve read, and half based on what you discover about your kids. No book or person can tell you exactly how to raise your children because every child is different, but books do offer good suggestions. It is up to you to determine what might work and what definitely wont work in your situation.
My daughter, for instance, was a lot younger. She actually had a piggy bank that she used to save her allowance in, and was a bit harder for her to understand the ups and downs of fanacial responsibility. But she did learn.
Anyway, if youre looking for parenting pointers youll be happy to know that there are plenty of podcasts on the subject. One in particular that I like is called The Parent Code. It covers a wide variety of subjects from breastfeeding to curfews. They dont address the tough subjects, like what to do about lying or biting, and should you spank and when, but the topics they do cover are important and you are bound to get some good ideas from them.
Check out The Parent Code podcast at the iTunes Store.
And while were on the subject of younguns, one thing I can tell you is that kids are a heck of a lot smarter than most adults believe.
When my daughter was born and all through her baby years I refused to let doting relatives talk to her using "baby talk."
"Wuzzacutey is NOT a word," Id tell them, sometimes not unkindly, "either you talk to her like a person or you dont talk to her at all."
Needless to say I was not a family favorite for some time, but I was trying to make a point. I had read somewhere and believed that kids brains everywhere were being wasted because adults around them dumb down their interaction them. Children require attention and need to be challenged. Their minds are like little grey sponges desperate to soak up and make sense of anything we throw at them. If we give them stupid stuff how can we expect anything smart from them?
When most kids could barely piece together a three word sentence my daughter was able to have a full and surprisingly mature conversation with you.
That mental stimulation should carry well into their adolescent years. I always kept Omni and Discover magazines around when my kids were growing up and Id catch one flipping the pages from time to time. Mental stimulation is a good thing.
Today if you want to hold your kids interest in anything other than video games youll have to do better than dusty old magazines. How about a video podcast from Scientific America and 60 Second Science called Instant Egghead?
Done yawning?
The mag aimed at armchair kown-it-all wannabes actually produces some really interesting one to five minute episodes covering everything from robotic cars to a discussion of Earth without people. The latter may sound grisly, but the episode, hosted by a rather crudely animated character, gives us some rather sobering insight on how our planet would eventually heal itself once were not around to screw things up anymore, and what kid wouldnt find that fascinating?
Actually, the Instant Egghead podcast is a collection of videos from other Scientific America and 60 Science videos. Still, this really is good stuff, folks, and you can play it on your iPod as well as Apple TV and iPhone. Another benefit is that these tidbits of science wont sit around your house collecting dust.
Dustless on-demand multimedia science entertainment that kids may enjoy: Life is good. Go grab a few episodes of Instant Egghead. You and your wee ones will start to feel brainy almost instantly (hence the name).
OK, enough about the kids. You deal with those little snot makers almost 24/7. You needs some adult humor, and you need it NOW.
Madams and messieurs, may I direct you to Things You Cant Do...
What is it, you ask?
As the name implies, the podcast episodes are vignettes that feature something you shouldnt do in a given situation, like while visiting someones home, for instance.
If you must think about the kids I suppose you could let them watch Things You Cant Do.., and use the podcast as a teaching aid, but I wouldnt recommend it.
Anyway, thats going to do it for this week. I wont be posting a Free on iTunes next Friday since it is the 4th of July holiday in the United States, but Ill have one ready the following Friday, July 11.
Have a safe and enjoyable holiday.
More freebies at the iTunes Store (with direct links):
Vern Seward is a writer who currently lives in Orlando, FL. He’s been a Mac fan since Atari Computers folded, but has worked with computers of nearly every type for 20 years.
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